heal·ing [hee-ling]
adjective
growing sound; getting well; mending.
exactly, hopefully, what i am in the midst of. i realize i have been vague lately. but, you see, i am not in a state to be spilling much over right now. and eventually, i am sure i will get to a place where words will make sense of it, but that time is not now. now, i just need to be. not wallow, not ignore, but just...be. allow myself that grace, at least. and heal. mend.
the way to do so is to change the behaviors that have become habitual and damaging. it's a conversation with myself that goes like this: self, what would you normally do here? okay - that, then - do the opposite of that. be a little uncomfortable. it will be good for you.
it isn't everything. it is not as though i have been doing all the wrong things, and making all the wrong choices. but. there are just some things that require intentional acting upon. beneficial, good, truthful things. and some of them? well, they are not natural to me. and so that is what i am working on. even the little things.
such as. i mentioned yesterday, one of my goals this week was to listen to music that makes me happy. not just because, you know, i like music. but because music is really powerful, and the right, or wrong kind, really affects my heart. i have found that when i intentionally blast my ears with atom-dancing-inducing music, then it helps me me get out of morose-like places. it helps me not...forget the bad. but, rather, remember the good. and that is what i need. that, i think, is really what everyone needs now and then.
so this is a musical week here at rejoicing in the hands. today, i share with you the asteroids galaxy tour. i probably won't say much here about them, because you will understand anything there possibly is to say about them much much better by just listening to their music. and probably also by reading the description on their website, here. except i will say, if i had to choose to be anyone famous in the world, it would probably be the lead vocalist, mette lindberg, in all her seventies-fabulousness and glamour.
there. now aren't you happy, too? really fantastic, right?
anyhow. the truth i am choosing to repeat today is this: i have friends who love and support me. i am not alone.
i hope you are all having a splendid tuesday.
I am not sure what you are going through right now, but I know that when I was going through some rough patches a few months ago, you always seemed to encourage me. I hope that I can do the same for you.
ReplyDeleteKalie, I think you're truly brave. It takes a lot from a person to recognize 'bad habits' and then take the step to wanting to change. That is huge. & The Lord is pleased by that. He doesn't expect perfection, ever, He just wants us to face reality and within our weaknesses embrace His strength.
I am proud of you, girl.
XO
Bren
brenda, thank you. truly, that means so much to me from you, and it is certainly encouraging. because i don't, you know, feel very brave, and it's hard to see growth and change from where i'm at. but when people, like you, tell me that i am making a good choice, it strengthens me. i trust the wise and loving people around me, and you are one of them! and thank you for that reminder, so much.
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